This guy has a job for me. I don't know him. Okay, in all fairness, I don't know any of the people who send mail to my spam folder. But this guy is persistent about this job he claims to have for me. And I have two jobs already so I don't need another.
My greatest spam collector is my Yahoo email address. I thought I'd opted out of that whole tracking gig where they claim to monitor your internet activity for the purpose of bringing you offers that will appeal to you. Apparently, unchecking and opting out does not deter the spammers from knowing exactly what you need. Then again, maybe it does. Let's review the content of my spam, shall we?
In preparation for writing this, I've saved the spam of the weekend. It may be more zesty than weekday spam... I don't know as I haven't conducted that survey yet.
6-Sex emails trying to direct me to sexy websites
8-Viagra/other sexual stimulation drug come on's
19-Meet singles emails (including christian, over 30, over 50, black, local, and "match found")
16-Debt elimination choices
35-Ways to make money, work from home, be rich scams
9-Pet medication bargains
3-Credit card offers
18-Health offers (including a fair amount of Ephedra offers)
7-Auto loan or car valuation emails
10-Online university/education opportunities
7-Slot secrets
5-Ink deals
4-Starbucks gift cards
24-Miscellaneous offers (including photo contests, home mortgages, Craftmatic adjustable beds, psychic readings, movie tickets, and messages from ebay members I've never solicited).
Now that's 171 offers I can't refuse, people. Wow. I have to admit that looking at that list of spam, my life sucks if that's what they've targeted me to be interested in. Darnit. I wanted to believe that I was already sexy, interesting, wealthy, and educated. Guess it isn't so.
It's doubly disappointing given that today is my birthday. At 41, I'm not perfect. I thought I would be by now. If I was everything I hoped to be wouldn't my spam list look something like this?
48-Offers of modeling
11-Marriage proposals
6-Beggars for money
8-Book agent propositions
3-Auto dealerships offering free cars
7-Free tickets to Vegas
4-Television agencies asking for my face on their commercials
1-Infomercial offer
Oh well. Maybe in my next life.
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3 comments:
It's your lucky day. If you reply within 24 hours I'll take pictures of you, ask you to marry me, steal your money, throw a book at you, sell you my car, give you a discount coupon to Vegas, video tape you for the hell of it and post it on a pay per view site.
Hows that ? :grin:
Alrighty then! Thanks! ;)
Happy Birthday, Suz.
Funny post. I get the same type spam. A lot of Viagra stuff and stuff about horny housewives. WTF?!?
I love the title of your blog. Thanks for adding me, and I'm adding you to my blog roll. It takes a few hours usually to show up.
I'll be stopping by again.
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