Heh, You Don't Say

Last night I waited on a guy who turned 91 yesterday. Would you like to know what his infinite words of wisdom about life were to me? We all love those words to live by that the older lot can hand down, don't we? And I didn't ask him for his great secrets to life, he just doled them out, unsolicited.

Before I just hand out this secret o' life, I want you to meet this gentle soul who graced my world for a few moments of his birthday. He came in with his wife, who was quiet, but like him, stunningly adept and aware of her surroundings. They were joined by a son or daughter and his or her spouse. They ordered what they wanted, and when they were done, the 91-year old's wife said in her quiet manner, "I think he'd like mushrooms for his steak." I smiled and nodded, as everyone who ordered steak had declined my upsell suggestion. But a wife knows. And it was his birthday.

The birthday boy was chatty as he came into the dining room. His daughter (?) was adjusting his hearing aid as I greeted the table. As I poured water, she finished and took her seat, asking her father if that was better. Yes, but the background noise was loud. I took note and spoke more loudly so noone at the table would have to strain to hear the specials, the soup, the surprise of a free birthday dinner for Mister Ninety-One. After I'd finished my usual greeting and asked for a drink order, the gentleman piped up with, "No, we'll get drunk at home!" I laughed and nodded. He made me chuckle right away.

They were a lovely table, causing no problems whatsoever. Me and the other waitresses were not taxed at all on this quiet evening, and as it turned out this table would be my last of the night. With the boon of a Packer win and the suggestion from last night that if the Packers won, "we have to celebrate and have 20 drinks" the plan was to sit and relish our win, enjoy our friendships. And so it would be. But not before I learned the lesson of life from this man who has seen it all in over 90 years on this earth.

The old gent allowed the ladies to order first, maybe so he could steal the show by being last. When I got next to him for optimal hearing and conversation, he looked me straight in the eye and said, "If there's anything you want to know about being 90, you just ask me." I smiled at him and told him I would think about that opportunity. After he ordered his food, he spoke again about his age. I guess when you're 91, time is running short so you don't hesitate to speak your mind. I should have been thinking of some question I wanted a sage answer to instead of asking what sort of salad dressing the man would like.

It is sort of like somone saying to you, "If you could ask God "One Question" what would it be? No one is ready for a challenge like that. I mean, I should have had some unbelievable question for the man who offered to give an answer to any question I had about making it to 91-years old. I had nothing. I felt sort of shallow, not having something prepared for this moment of great revealing... And he could hear just fine. It wasn't like I'd have had to shout my question and hope he'd hear it. He answered each meal preparation question easily, not like an old fogey who needs a question repeated louder and louder until you are shouting your question at him. He was a-okay in the hearing and cognizance departments, in spite of all the fuss early on.

When the order was done, he looked at me and conveyed a serious demeanor. "Look here," he said, "there ain't nothing great about 90. Do stuff while you're young enough to do it because when you get to 90, there ain't nothin'." He looked only half-satisfied with that tidbit of insider information, so he continued, "And I haven't done anything to get here. I just put one foot in front of the other my whole life. There's no secret to being 90."

I felt sort of sad by that admission to the secrets of life. But he didn't seem like one of those sad old men. Hell, he still had a very lovely wife who as much there as he was. I don't know that many 90-year olds who still have their spouses here on this earth. I bet if it hadn't been an historic day (birthdays after 75 are historic, right?), he'd have been more jolly than he was. I bet on a normal Thursday he is the happiest guy in the world to be living with a woman who I'll wager has been his wife for more than 50 years!

He made me think, though. He still had a sparkle in his eye, despite his gloomy prediction that there is nothing going on when you are 91. Life is what we make it. I think that guy must have a pretty good attitude to be in such great mental and physical shape. I don't know the heartbreaks and hell he's been through in his life, but I sure would have loved to sit down with him and let him tell me some stories about the road to yesterday's birthday. He was cool, and my birthday wish for him is that he finds the excitement that makes him leap out of bed in the mornings, happy to be here another day.