At Least She Ate It

I thought I was ready to talk about the Packers, but it turns out I'm still feeling pretty pissed off and betrayed. So, to get back into the blog swing, I present you with a cute, cuddly kitty story. Or not.

Mrs. Kisses has developed a diva syndrome. She is mad. She's the youngest. The only girl. The only fat one in the family. I think she's developed some issues because of some perceived injustices to her fragile ego. She doesn't eat wet food, so when I feed the old guys I don't even do a dish for her anymore. If she does happen to wander into the kitchen at breakfast time, I sometimes give her a few bites in a bowl of her own. She licks it, and walks away. Not interested in the food, but there's always the test of how much the momma loves her. She vies for the spot that Punkin has occupied for 15 years next to me in the bed. Yes, I shoo her away and pat my hand to a more appropriate place for her to lay her fat ass when we sleep. She usually concedes, but there are problems if Punkie is late to bed.

Are these valid gripes for the chubby one? I don't know, but she has certainly come up with plenty of tactics to combat these horrible actions. She uses some mean intimidation on the boys. They "play" but she bites--hard. She chases them. She kind of stalks them. Last night Punkie was doing that cat walk where they walk real slow and look straight ahead, hoping that the offending creature doesn't see them sidling away. It was kind of funny, but really pretty sad seeing him trying to get away from her. It made me wonder what she pulls when I'm not here. Mister Moo had a little knot of fur in the middle of his back. I was brushing it out when Mrs. Kisses noticed that Mister Moo was getting some attention with the brush. I alternated my efforts, but Mister Moo just ran away because he (apparently) didn't want to face the wrath of Misses Pisses in the aftermath of the attention he was receiving.

She's a bitch! Who knew?

So, today she must have thought she found the perfect way to leap into first place with the Momma. Mind you, she has NEVER brought me anything as the leader of the den. Punkie brings me toy mouses all the time. Mister Moo treads lightly around the outskirts of being part of the family, choosing to sleep on the floor in front of the couch instead of actually making the leap of faith to vie for a cozy spot on the couch. Mrs. Kisses chooses the best place and makes it her own. She generally acts like the Garfield cat around here. But, today! The door was propped open for the kitties to enjoy some inside-outside freedom on my day off, as usual. Sitting at the computer on the other side of the house, I heard a strange mewing. Punkie was in his favorite spot, Mister Moo was sprawled out in front of the stereo speakers like he usually is...Mrs. Kisses is making those noises??

I walked back to the hallway to see if a strange cat had entered through the open door. Mrs. Kisses was sitting in the middle of the hallway, standing proudly over something I couldn't see at the bottom of the stairs by the bathroom door. "Oh God, what do you have?" I asked her fearfully. She looked at me proudly. I carefully leaned over the steps to see what kind of horror she had brought in. It was a substantial little thing. I couldn't really see what it was, except I saw that it had wings and a heaving little blackish body. My first guess was a hummingbird, though I had no idea how she might have caught one! I went back to turn the hall light on for a better look. When I came back and looked, I could see it was something weird. Fatter than a dragonfly with shorter wings, but definitely not a hummingbird. (Whew)!!

I went to get my camera, which was plugged into the computer for some picture transfers. Of course it wouldn't turn on! I tried to get a picture of the weird bug that beast of a feline brought in to present to me, but the camera would not turn on! I stood there fighting with the camera, pleading it to turn on so I could capture Mrs. Kisses moment of glory--to no avail. Meanwhile, she ate the bug.

At least I didn't have to try to flick it out the door.